ALMOST

I have a confession to make.....my heart is about to burst. We received Travel Approval on my birthday, April 5th. First the travel date was April 29th the very next day it was changed to May 6th. My son has been waiting for 4yr and 10 months for his forever family but this small delay has kicked me in the gut. I have shut down the image of my son waiting and waiting is more than my heart can stand. Every few hours it hits me between the eyes, he is coming home to stay. At the Davis house, bed time is crazy with all the kisses and hugs. Ian has never had a Mom to tuck him into bed or hold him when his is afraid. I have been praying he will have peace and know that we are now his family.

The only cool thing about this wait......Rhonda is meeting me in China and traveling to his province. Rhonda is my cousin that is more like my sister. Her family has been living in Indonesia for the last few years. Just like a McLendon to have to go all the way to China to have dinner with family.

Amos Story - Music Video - Aaron Ivey

TICK

Yes, we are waiting again. For what you ask?? Travel Approval or TA and our Consultant Appointment or CA.....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! It's hard wrapping my brain around my son being home for his 5th birthday. I started a packing spread sheet.....yes, a spread sheet a few months back and it doesn't work any longer. The weather in April or May is going to be VERY HOT!!! I started with long sleeves and need tank top and linen now....why do we always travel in the summer??

PHOTO

I read some very sad news last night from a blog friend. Ms. C had received a child's file with photo and was in the process of reviewing the information....then was called and informed the child could no longer be considered for adoption. This could mean one or two things.....the child had become very ill or had passed away. The thought of a child dying without ever knowing the love of family breaks my heart. We adopting parents fall in love with a photograph first and then the long journey begins to build a relationship. You could compare it to a sonogram without the physical connection. I don't understand why people find adoption love so strange.....do you love your husband or wife less than your siblings or extended family?? Why is so hard to expect love of photograph of a child you have never met as powerful and binding? The last nine months have physically hurt me at times and emotionally brought me to my knees. I pray every minute of every day for all my children....the same as any other Mother. Please, pray for the child in the photograph and the family that grieves her passing.

IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING....

My Dad is in the hospital with a broken leg! He had a blower on his back, became dizzy and fell. I had Deja Vu of when I was sent to stay with my uncle in Hawaii for the summer at age eleven. The day of my return, my father fell off the roof during a storm cleaning the gutters. When we finally found him he was screaming at me to get help. I FROZE!! He never forgave me. That summer he unleashed his disappointment and destroyed whatever trust we had. I never felt safe again in my parents' house. Weird....how one day can change you forever. The drive to the hospital was spent mad at my husband. Why? He didn't answer his phone. It wasn't that he didn't pick up the phone, he left me to face the crazy alone. I stayed with my mother and helped in all the ways a daughter should.....but the rage. Dad wanted to be in control and he let me know it......his is no longer in control. He can no longer walk on his own or drive. Is the lack of control what makes him crazy? I stood in the emergency room and tried to make jokes and make this man happy. What? yes, happy...............

ARTICLE 5 ......Done

MIRROR, MIRROR ON THE WALL

How many of you remember the movie "MASK" with Cher??? The scene where they are in the fun house and the son looks in the weird mirror and looks like a typical kid. I have the same mirror but it makes me look 30 not 47. It's hard for me to wrap my brain around being so close to 50...YIKES!!!! In my twenties the best word to describe me was SKINNY, now not so much. I have always been a blue jean girl so my style is not that different from my early years.......just the size!!! I look in that crazy mirror and see a more confident person that has changed her priorities but where has time gone? My mother's side of the family has longevity and one of my great aunts lived to 99 and looked fabulous. My Mom- Robby McLendon...AKA NiNi is radiant and still makes my father swoon. I just saying when your favorite music is played on the oldie station and you drive a mini van and wear glasses.....your youth has passed and middle age has happened. I want to give thanks to Ms. Clairol and Ms. Lancome for helping me not go quietly into old age.